Follow Up to “Casual Wednesday Night”

I am in complete agreement with Belle’s last post. We were texting in full on RAGE mode late last night.

So much so that I even went as far as to make the extreme suggestion that we remove ALL barrels from the house in order to force people to bring their trash to the outdoor barrels.

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I also sent a helpful message to the group chat.

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Because this:

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Makes Belle and I turn into this:

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~ Meg

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Casual Wednesday Night

Did the three little pigs move in upstairs? Because this place is a fucking dump.

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I got home on a WEDNESDAY night, around 10:15pm, and not only is there company over again (for the third WEEKnight in a row), but the apartment is an utter shit hole. No, but really, for princesses these girls are total and complete slobs.

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I guess it’s to be expected when you grow up with servants or little birds and rodents and crabs doing all your chores for you.

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I’m sorry, your highness, but is it that difficult to walk down a goddamn flight of stairs and dump your shit into a bigger barrel?

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HOW DO YOU HAVE PEOPLE OVER WHEN THE PLACE LOOKS LIKE THIS!?!

YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES.

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xoxoBelle

Oh yeah? You wanna know what I think?!

Flashback to when we first moved in. Belle had not yet arrived so for the time being it was just myself, Snow White, and occasionally Merida.

One night I was in my room and just starting to put up decorations when Merida invited some of our mutual friends over. Since we didn’t have any living room furniture at the time hanging out in my room was the most logical option.

Things were going great. I multi-tasked while catching up with everyone and what their plans were for the summer.

Then Snow White decided to grace us with her presence.

“Knock knock,” she said as she walked in the room.

Um, okay.

Real talk. She obviously felt like she had the right to include herself with my friends and have access to my extra comfy seating. Whatever. Both Belle and I think it’s also because everyone (including her) quickly realized that I ended up drawing for and winning the best room (fair and square).

Kind of like when we all found out my room had access to an outdoor porch space, and Snow White brilliantly asked, “So, what are we gonna do about the porch?”

We, bitch?

It hasn’t been brought up since. Except for those rare occasions when a package is dropped off on the porch instead of front door for some odd reason.

But I digress.

After a little bit. it was starting to get late and I had work the next morning because I am an (almost) adult. And, like normal, considerate fucking people, Merida and our friends said good night and left.

Before this, Snow White had stepped out of the room.

Assuming that I was going to be alone, I started gathering my toiletries so I could shower and wind down for the night.

NOPE.

Apparently, Snow White had other plans.

Just as I was about to exit my room, shower caddy and towel in hand, she barges back in with a fresh cup of tea.

The fuck….

Maybe it was because she had no social graces. Maybe it was because she was clueless. Maybe it’s Maybelline. Who knows!

The point is, I was clearly not entertaining anymore and she had to leave.

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Trying to not be a total bitch, I tried to subtly clue her in that I was going to be retiring soon and she should leave.

“I think I’m going to take a shower…” I said. HINT HINT.

“Okay. I think I’m going to sit here,” she replied.

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Oh? Are you now? The sheer fucking nerve.

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Who did this bitch think she was?

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So what do I do because (at this point) I was too nice?

I LEAVE MY ROOM AND LET HER SIT IN THERE ON MY COMFY CHAIR. AHHHHH.

Luckily, her dad showed up soon after to drop off some things. During this time I discretely snuck out of the bathroom and firmly closed my door.

No more tea time for you, bitch.

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~ Meg

What’s the deal with Stonehenge?

Or rather, why the hell is my home named after a prehistoric pile of rocks?

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Answer: Music Majors.

Unbeknownst to me and Meg, the other princesses sat around imbibing one night, and decided that our apartment needed a name. Now, don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the ritual of naming things of value — I name my cars, for instance, but don’t you think that should be a decision that  ALL the roommates would be involved with?

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Nope.

So, after this night of drunken laughter and debauchery, Meg and I are casually and indirectly informed of this preposterous christening of 94 Walker. Of course, having been left out of this decision, we are instantly defiant and repulsed (as a matter of principle, but also because “Stonehenge” is moronic). When we ask for an explanation through gritted teeth, we are answered with stifled laughter and choking replies of “there’s this song” and “you had to be there.”

See “this song” below:

Yeah. That song is why the ENTIRE music department now knows about our apartment. How music majors appreciate such idiocy is beyond me, but we are now the talk of a significantly large group of people (people who play ukuleles and sing in the living room at 2:30am). This dubbing of 94 Walker has also been a catalyst for incessant vomit-inducing snap chat stories citing the “Stonehenge Trio” (Snow White, Ariel, and Jasmine). More about that later.

Anyways, Ariel tried to create a colorful poster explaining the name – to hang on the wall upstairs (it would go very nicely with Snow White’s classy Mardi Gras beads hanging all over the the banister), but she left her work unattended for a number of weeks, so finally in a fit of pre-my-roommates-don’t-clean-rage-strike I destroyed it with great satisfaction. Do not tangle with me.

As one of our dear friends (we’ll call her Rapunzel) said last night, Meg is “passive aggressive” and Belle is “aggressive-aggressive.” Mess with the bull Belle and you’ll get the horns because….

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xoxoBelle

The Strike

Congratulations are in order. It’s official. Meg and Belle are on strike.

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After months of being the only two taking out the trash/recycling (including emptying barrels, dragging barrels to and from curb), replenishing paper goods supplies (toilet paper, paper towels, etc…), and furnishing community spaces with other essentials we have both banded together and decided it’s time the other princesses step up and pitch in.

Let’s call it a social experiment of sorts.

We’ve tried taking a step back in the past, but have become so bothered by the disgusting messes that we’ve caved and ended up doing ALL THE THINGS. Because apparently overflowing barrels, lack of paper goods, and general untidiness only bothers the two of us.

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Not this time. We will not cave. We will be resilient!!

I wish I could say I had faith in the others to know how to take out the trash and clean up, but honestly I’m not getting my hopes up.

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~ Meg

Translation

What Snow White says: I left these avocados out on the counter! They’re for everyone! Peace and love!!

What Snow White means: I am relinquishing responsibility for these and having everyone else take equal ownership so when they go bad and attract a swarm of miniature fruit flies I don’t have to throw them away.

~ Meg