“I’m just thinking about our utility bill with two fridges…”

The fridge saga continues. Our landlord is finally replacing the broken fridge with two smaller (full size) fridges. One for each floor. Convenient and awesome, right? Now the troll can stay upstairs where she belongs!

wrong

There’s always something with this girl.

In the words of Ariel, “Wait what?”

The girl who just had to have the most expensive room in the apartment…

The girl who leaves every light on in the house…

The girl who leaves her fan and radio on while going home for the weekend…

The girl who leaves the AC on when she isn’t even in the room – WITH WINDOWS OPEN…!

…is concerned about our utility bills!?

I’m sorry — are you FUCKING SERIOUS?!

It took every fiber of my being, not to make an aggressive comment about turning off the goddamn lights and being more thoughtful about electricity…and then I remembered she has had a personal mini fridge up there since she moved in!

(yes, in case you forgot, her exploding tofu was in our broken fridge when she had a perfectly good mini fridge upstairs)

So, being the bitch that I am…I responded passive aggressively about he mini fridge.

If you can’t afford the bills, don’t pick the room that’s $90 more expensive a month. Or better yet, go back home where you have a bunch of people to coddle you, wash your dishes, and take out your trash since you aren’t even taking classes this year anyway.

xoxoBelle

Oh yeah? You wanna know what I think?!

Flashback to when we first moved in. Belle had not yet arrived so for the time being it was just myself, Snow White, and occasionally Merida.

One night I was in my room and just starting to put up decorations when Merida invited some of our mutual friends over. Since we didn’t have any living room furniture at the time hanging out in my room was the most logical option.

Things were going great. I multi-tasked while catching up with everyone and what their plans were for the summer.

Then Snow White decided to grace us with her presence.

“Knock knock,” she said as she walked in the room.

Um, okay.

Real talk. She obviously felt like she had the right to include herself with my friends and have access to my extra comfy seating. Whatever. Both Belle and I think it’s also because everyone (including her) quickly realized that I ended up drawing for and winning the best room (fair and square).

Kind of like when we all found out my room had access to an outdoor porch space, and Snow White brilliantly asked, “So, what are we gonna do about the porch?”

We, bitch?

It hasn’t been brought up since. Except for those rare occasions when a package is dropped off on the porch instead of front door for some odd reason.

But I digress.

After a little bit. it was starting to get late and I had work the next morning because I am an (almost) adult. And, like normal, considerate fucking people, Merida and our friends said good night and left.

Before this, Snow White had stepped out of the room.

Assuming that I was going to be alone, I started gathering my toiletries so I could shower and wind down for the night.

NOPE.

Apparently, Snow White had other plans.

Just as I was about to exit my room, shower caddy and towel in hand, she barges back in with a fresh cup of tea.

The fuck….

Maybe it was because she had no social graces. Maybe it was because she was clueless. Maybe it’s Maybelline. Who knows!

The point is, I was clearly not entertaining anymore and she had to leave.

Trying to not be a total bitch, I tried to subtly clue her in that I was going to be retiring soon and she should leave.

“I think I’m going to take a shower…” I said. HINT HINT.

“Okay. I think I’m going to sit here,” she replied.

Oh? Are you now? The sheer fucking nerve.

Who did this bitch think she was?

So what do I do because (at this point) I was too nice?

I LEAVE MY ROOM AND LET HER SIT IN THERE ON MY COMFY CHAIR. AHHHHH.

Luckily, her dad showed up soon after to drop off some things. During this time I discretely snuck out of the bathroom and firmly closed my door.

No more tea time for you, bitch.

~ Meg